More Blonde jokes

Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in
a drive-in movie? They went to see "Closed for the
Winter."

                  ***************
                  Why did the blonde resolve to have only 3 children?  She
heard that one out of every four children born in the
world was Chinese.

                  ***************

                  Did you hear about the near-tragedy at the mall?  There
was a power outage, and twelve blondes were stuck on the
escalators for over four hours.

                  *****************

                   A blonde was driving home after a game and got caught
in a really bad hailstorm. Her car was covered with
dents, so the next day she took it to a repair shop.
The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided
to have some fun.

                   He told her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe
really hard, and all the dents would pop out.

                   So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and
knees and started blowing into her tailpipe. Nothing
happened. So she blew a little harder, and still
nothing happened.

                   Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What
are you doing?"

                   The first blonde told her how the repairman had
instructed her to blow into the tail pipe in order to
get all the dents to pop out.

                    The roommate rolled her eyes and said, "Duh, like
hello! You need to roll up the windows first."

                  ****************

                   A blonde went to an eye doctor to have her eyes checked
for glasses. The doctor directed her to read various
letters with the left eye while covering the right eye.

                   The blonde was so mixed up on which eye was which that
the eye doctor, in disgust, took a paper lunch bag with
a
                  hole to see through, covered up the appropriate eye and
asked her to read the letters.

                   As he did so, he noticed the blonde had tears streaming
down her face.

                   "Look," said the doctor, "there's no need to get
emotional about getting glasses."

                   "I know," agreed the blonde, "But I kind of had my
heart set on wire frames."

                  ****************

                    A blonde was shopping at a Target Store and came
across a silver thermos. She was quite fascinated by
it, so she picked it up and brought it over to the
clerk to ask what it was.

                   The clerk said, "That's ! a thermos . . . it keeps some
things hot and some things cold."

                   "Wow, said the blonde, "that's amazing. I'm going to
buy it!"  So she bought the thermos and took it to work
the next day.

                   Her boss saw it on her desk. "What do you have there?"
he asked.

                  "Why, that's a thermos . . . it keeps hot things hot and
cold things cold," she replied.

                   Her boss inquired, "What do you have in it?"

                   The blond replied, "Two Popsicles, and some coffee".


                  ***************

                   A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets
full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful
(you guessed it) blonde.  The puzzled blonde kept
looking at him and his bulging pockets.

                   Finally, after many such glances from her, he said,
"It's golf balls."

                   Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him
thoughtfully and finally, not being able to contain her
curiosity any longer, asked, "Does it hurt as much as
tennis elbow?"

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                  This has to be one of the best blonde jokes around.
This should make all you technologically challenged
people feel GOOD:

                   A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife,
Susie, something nice for their first wedding
anniversary. So he decided to buy her a cell phone.  He
showed her the phone and explained to her all of its
features.

                   Susie was excited to receive the gift and simply adored
her new phone.

                   The next day Susie went shopping. Her phone rang and,
to her astonishment, it was her husband on the other
end. "Hi Susie," he said, "how do you like your new
phone?"

                   Susie replied, "I just love it!  It's so small and your
voice is clear as a bell, but there's one thing I don't
understand though..."

                   "What's that, sweetie?" asked her husband.

                   "How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"

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