Fitting


Those that know me or anything about my life, know what bs my husband and I endured and put up with when it came to my husbands ex wife, Juanita. She was pretty much the main thorn all throughout our nearly 12 yrs of being together, but early early on in our marriage, in Oct 1996 as a matter of fact, after an argument my husband and I had because of her, we decided that no way on earth we would allow her to come between us again. He always said, "You can't reason with an unreasonable person" and boy was he right on the money when it came to her.
One day, I was reading something and happen to come across this poem by Maya Angelou. When I read it, it so fit my situation in regards to his ex. All through my marriage and for several months after my husband died, she tried to bring me down. Yep, she kicked me when I was at the lowest point in my life after my husband died, by writing 4 times on my website that I had at the time, that I killed my husband. Really it was no surprise, considering the crap she pulled with me the day of his memorial service, but  Thank GOD for my support system I had and continue to have. Anyway, when she read the poem, she told me that my "attempts to be sexy failed in her favor". I had no idea what she was talking about, so I just told her the jist of the poem went right over her head, as I knew it would.
Every now and then I may write something about her and mine and my husbands life in regards to her and her kids. While it is all in the past, sometimes it creeps up and I will deal with it in the only way I know how...to write about it.
Still I Rise

BY MAYA ANGELOU 
You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

 
Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

 
Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

 
Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,
Weakened by my soulful cries?

 
Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own backyard.

 
You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

 
Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

 
Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

 
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.


Maya Angelou, "Still I Rise" from And Still I Rise. Copyright © 1978 by Maya Angelou. Used by permission of Random House, Inc.

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