HIS Ex...

My husband's ex wife has hated me from the gate. I really have no idea why. Is it because she never really got over him? That she was still in with him? I think so, after all, in April 1990, she sent him a card that said even though they divorce legally, it didn't have to be the end of them. Other things she has said through out the years, and they way she harped on him constantly, gave me the impression she never got over him. Oh sure, she SAID she hated him, she SAID he made her hate him  more and more each day, BUT, there is a fine line between love and hate, as the old saying goes.

This woman hates me so much that she accused me and convinced her children that I was the cause of her divorce from her second husband. She lives in another state, 1500 miles or so away, how could I be the cause of her divorce? Forget the fact that she called the police on my hubby and LIED to them, almost getting him arrested, when she told the Deputy that my hubby took HER kids out of the County of where their divorce originally was, (San Diego) and was holding them against their will. What she FAILED to mention to the Deputy was that neither my hubby nor her live in that county any longer, for one, and for two, she FAILED to mention that truth be known, SHE and her then husband dropped the kids off for the agreed upon visitation! I can't imagine what would have happened had we not had her emails and hand written letters proving that she no longer lived in the same County as the divorce, also proving that what she told the Deputy on the phone and what she wrote in emails were two different things.

I barely met her second ex husband, ONCE, and that was in 1995. For that matter, I barely met her at the same time. I have seen her a couple times throughout the years at visitation time, however I have never seen her with her sunglasses off, wonder why? I have seen 3 pictures of her, one when she had a pic taken of herself, my husband and their son, when they were still married, (1986) another one, was when she married her second (now ex) husband (in 1993- she sent it to my husband, why? who knows, but she sent two of the same picture, LOL) and the third one she was written about in an article pertaining to her line of work (around 2000-2001). She looked different in all the pics.

This woman wrote in an email to me on March 14, 2002, that she "will be sure to piss on your grave and make sure it says that you wasted your life on being a bitch and getting into people business...you are mean, vicious, vindictive, jealous and just plain ugly..."

This woman has verbally threatened me (via telephone), she constantly puts my children down, she has accused me of impersonating her, as if, good grief, has called me just about every name in the book, there is just so much, SO much stuff. I often think of writing a book, I surely have enough material :-)

So, when I read this poem, she was the first person I thought of. She tried to bring me down, but she couldn't, and didn't, so this is dedicated to her...

Still I Rise

You may write me down in history   
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt   
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?   
’Cause I walk like I've got oil wells   
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,   
With the certainty of tides,   
Just like hopes springing high,   
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?   
Bowed head and lowered eyes?   
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,   
Weakened by my soulful cries?

Does my haughtiness offend you?   
Don't you take it awful hard
’Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines   
Diggin’ in my own backyard.

You may shoot me with your words,   
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I’ll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds   
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,   
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,   
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.   
I rise
I rise   
I rise.
Maya Angelou, “Still I Rise” from And Still I Rise. Copyright © 1978 by Maya Angelou. Used by permission of Random House, Inc.

Source: The Complete Collected Poems of Maya Angelou (1994)


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