On the record...For the record

Due to the fact that my husband's ex had neglected to put his name on the medical, dental, school information,  like he never existed, he thought maybe it was the same for the babysitter. My husband had been court ordered to pay $100, towards child care, in Dec 1995. His ex had given us the sitters name and number on a $100 Monopoly bill.

ON June 6th, 1996, Juanita wrote, " When the kids aren't in daycare, I will be reimbursing you the childcare funds taken from your check after your check arrives. If you agree to it you could pay me for the back child support and medical costs out of this money."

This does not say that she is not using the sitter anymore, or that she canceled the sitter.On Feb 23rd, 1997 the ex wrote  my husband that she paid her aunt and cousin to take care of their daughter while she stayed there for a week. She said she was working and they needed to feed and entertain their daughter. So as far as we knew, the ex was still using the sitter and paying family to take care of the kids while they visited other family members.

When I called the sitter, on or around June 23rd, 1998  to see if the ex had given my husbands info to the sitter, as my husband asked me too, there was not much conversation because it seemed the sitter did not know what I was talking about, and handed the phone to her son. I told the sitters son who I was and the reason I was calling. It was from him that we learned the kids did not go to the sitter anymore as of June 1997. My husband didn't know this nor did he say anything.

Apparently, and according to the ex, in a letter she wrote to my husband on JULY 12, 1998, the sitters husband went into Juanita's work on June 24th, and approached her about my phone call. according the ex, this is how it went,

"...I was at work on June 24, 1998, when (the sitters) husband approached me. He stated that (stepkids) step mom had called and he wasn't sure why... " 

She went on to write about the medical condition the sitter suffered and said that it had left the woman, "...unable to function normally for a very long time..." She told my husband that the sitter was now "...hardly the same person I knew or who watched the kids several years ago..." We did not know any of that, however she was trying to make it sound that my husband did not know I had called, when he said to do it. The ex wrote, "...When I asked whether you knew about this conversation, you acted surprised...." Um, no, he was not surprised, it was his idea, you called after 9pm and he was almost asleep.

Of course then, it became all about the ex, she wrote, "...you again managed to embarrass me in the small community I live in. This embarrassment is also felt by the kids, not to mention causing soem extra and unnecessary stress to (sitter, sitters husband and their family). (The sitter) was so upset by this telephone call and she drove to my house Wednesday and Thursday, July 1 and 2 1998. She was visibly shaken by the phone call. There was no reason what so ever to do this. Pat can feel rest assured she can embarrass me and my kids. She also caused some poor woman who  is not medically well, some stress...." 

HOLD UP! is Juanita SERIOUS!?? I placed this call on or around June 23rd, Juanita says she was "approached" on June 24th, and she waits about 2-3 weeks to take issue with it!? Her letter was dated, July 12, 1998, when she brought it up, and then she called my husband to "tattle" on July 17, 1998. WTF!? Not only that, but according to Juanita, the woman "...suffered a brain tumor or stroke which left her without hearing and unable to function normally for a very long time..." yet she writes that the woman DROVE to Juanita's house, not ONCE, but TWICE!? how is that possible, if the woman is so incompacitated!? SERIOUSLY!?

SO, I told my husband I would write the woman a letter and send it. In this letter, dated July 18th, 1998, I wrote who I was and who my husband was. I told her it had recently been brought to my attention, (July 17th)  that I had caused her and her family a great deal of stress and turmoil with my phone call to her on or around June 23, 1998. I explained to her that I called her home at the request of my husband to verify some information, that he wanted to confirm that his name and phone number were in fact, given to her in Jan. 1996, as another person to contact in the even there was an emergency with his kids, while they were in her care. I told her that was ALL the information I was trying to ascertain.  I asked her to please accept my sincerest apology, as hurting your family in any way shape or form was not my intention, and I had no idea that my call to her would have such an adverse affect and be so traumatic for her. I said I was deeply sorry for this. I thanked her for her time and said "God bless you."  and signed my name. I wrote a PS that if she had any questions, to please feel free to call or write and left our number. NEVER heard a peep.


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